Hiatus (because I chose my son over my laptop...)

So my 20-month-old son decided to climb on the back of the couch while I had my laptop out. His balance isn't as good as his courage leads him to believe. Faced with either letting him fall nearly 4 feet straight back onto the hardwood floors or holding onto my laptop, I lunged to grab the little guy's leg and my laptop skidded sideways off my lap. The corner of the display hit the floor with a gut-wrenching crack.

 My husband is kind of a tech genius (he's already talking about swapping out the display...) so I'm waiting for him to get home to tell me how bad it is. But I'm guessing I'll be offline for a bit while we figure it out.

 I made the right choice. Right?

Paying It Sideways?

pay it forward. by buttonheart / Chloe Price on Flickr

You know what's awesome? I'm an unagented, unpublished, unknown writer and yet I have readers. Even a few (dare I say it?) fans. I have people I've never met in real life cheering for me. People who remind me my writing isn't terrible, I'm not delusional and I can do this.

It's been about a year since I started taking my writing seriously. I entered my manuscript in the Amazon Breakthrough Novel Award contest on a whim and much to my surprise, I made it through to the quarter finals. Aside from the huge confidence boost, an excerpt from my manuscript was available on Amazon as a Kindle download. At one point, it even made it to #45 in free Kindle downloads. I got some awesome reviews of excerpt and even better, I made some new writing friends.

Writing is often a solitary endeavor. I write alone, cut off from the real world and lost in my own imagination. But when I joined Twitter, threw up a Facebook page and started this blog, I began to realize novels don't happen in vacuums.

After a scathing review from Publishers Weekly (citing my poor proof-reading skills, "shallow characterization" and too many male characters "inexplicably orbiting" around my main character), I dove right into rewrites. And then the magic started to happen. I had people begin to ask for the rest of my manuscript. People wanted to know how the story resolved. I sent it out to a few trusted friends, got good feedback and went back into rewrites.

Over the summer, I reach a new level in readership - I had someone I'd never met ask to read the rest! Leigh Ann gave me my first line edits and really helped whip this thing into shape. Then I met Kaleen and she asked all the right questions about things that didn't make sense. Ladonna found the perfect opening line buried at the end of the manuscript. Megan showed me why & how I needed to fix my final, climactic scene. And Tracy gave me one of the best compliments I've ever received about my writing. Several more have sacrificed time and occasionally sleep or family obligations to read and give me feedback on my manuscript, my pitch (thanks to Chessie, Lyla, Maggie & Gina), my query and my synopsis (thanks to Jessica, Robin, Cassandra, Kai, Jani & Juliana). I've posted on AgentQueryConnect and QueryTracker, receving invaluable feedback about how to sell my story in a single page.

There are dozens more who have encouraged me and cheered me on throughout this journey (sorry if I forgot to mention anyone...). What makes that more amazing is that these writers are all in the same place as me. I suppose they could be viewed as competition. But instead, they're my comrades in arms. They are the ones who keep me going after (another) form rejection and the ones who share links for new opportunities to share my work/catch an agent/promote myself.

I am so grateful for the entire writing community that has welcomed me with such open arms. I want to pay it forward, to take what I've been given and pass it along, but really, it's more like paying it sideways. We're on this journey together. Some of us might catch that break we're all hoping for sooner than others, but it will be a shared victory when one of us signs with an agent or gets that book deal we all dream of. Whatever successes I find in my writing career, I hope I never lose (not loose - one of those typos my crit partners & beta readers are ALWAYS finding...) sight of that. I hope I never forget to pay it forwards or backwards or sideways. I love being a part of the writing community and I hope I'll be able to invest back into the lives and careers of my fellow writers now and in the future.

So thank you to everyone who has invested in me and my writing. I only hope I can do the same for each of you some day.

Bella vs. Buffy or Why I Hate YA Heroines

Okay, hate is far too strong a word. But I have been very disappointed with most of the YA heroines I've read lately. I so seldom find girls I would have actually wanted to be friends with as a teen. Swoon-worthy boys abound, but I usually find the girls unworthy of their affections. Can't anyone write strong but vulnerable young women?

In almost every YA book I've read in recent year, the heroines tend toward two extremes: passive, shallow characters who exists only to build up the stronger, male character (ie, Bella) or they are brash, untouchable characters who don't need a man, only to fall in love in spite of themselves (ie, Buffy). And both types seem to view the desire for marriage and family as a weakness. The girls I knew as a teen were smart, resourceful and sensitive. They loved easily and wore their wounds like badges of honor. They were complicated and irrational. They were so much more than the girls portrayed in YA books today.

In the interest of full disclosure, I read all the Twilight books and (mostly) enjoyed them. I watched (the first couple seasons) of Buffy and enjoyed that as well. But isn't there a balance between girls who can't walk straight on their own and girls more likely to give someone a roundhouse kick than the time of day?

I relate to the weak heroines. I'm clumsy, unathletic and much better at mental tasks than anything physical. But I am fully capable of taking care of myself. I have a strong sense of self-preservation. I've learned to make up for what I lack in strength of body with strength of mind.

And I do admire the ass-kicking heroines. I'd love to have hair-trigger reflexes and the skills to take out anyone who underestimates me. But inevitably, after a tearful breakdown, the kiss-ass heroine realizes she cannot live without some boy and lets her obsession with him define her from there on out.

Women are strong and not because they can do everything men can do. They are strong because they can do things men can't do. Like carrying children and giving birth. The very things these YA heroines reject as weakness are the things I view as strength. Only the strongest risk mind and body to protect someone vulnerable with no thought of personal gain. And what is wrong with demanding some level of commitment from a boy before giving yourself to him?

I would love to see more YA heroines who use their brains instead of brawn to defeat their enemies. Girls who don't need a boy to tell them who they are. Girls who are clever and confident. The kind of girls I've known and admired throughout my life.

I know I fail at this as a writer. It's too easy to fall into those established archetypes. But I've tried to create a heroine who is at least worthy of my hero. I've tried to create a character I'd be proud to have as a daughter. Because the girls I know are neither weak and passive nor brash and untouchable. They are both and they deserve better than shallow stereotypes.

So what do you think? Are you disappointed with YA heroines or am I overreacting? Any recommendations for YA heroines you do like? What are some stereotypes/plot lines that bug you?